i’m not lying when i say that i sometimes wish i was someplace else; like the england countryside at wonderful music festivals or drinking wine in Paris or eating pasta in rome or drinking beer in ireland sometimes i feel as though there is so much life to be lived and i’m not fully living it. can you outgrow a place? more importantly, can you become a tourist in your own hometown? i want to laugh with genuine people who genuinely care about me, who fill my heart up with gladness and i want to walk around in unfamiliar places until my feet ache and i want to listen to elton john’s “your song” a million times on repeat. i want to write pretty words and i want to change lives with them. i don’t know why i am always finding myself in this “i feel like i am not fully living my life to the fullest” phase. i sit here day after day it seems looking at beautiful photos of cities and villages that i would love to visit and i read pretty words and i see people changing lives and i say “i want to do that” but then i never do.

it’s a shame really.

i’m not lying when i say that from here on out i will start fully living my life – i will get rid of toxic relationships and make room for the ones that will only embrace me and comfort me and make me the most emily that i can be. i will work my ass off to actually stand near Big Ben and walk through the english country side instead of looking at it through a photograph. I will be able to breathe it’s air and embrace it with everything that is within me. and, most importantly i will write until my heart’s delight and i won’t stop until my fingers get numb and i will write something one day that will matter.

i’m not lying when i say that I am ready to embrace my life


One thought on “embrace

  1. It’s entirely possible to feel like a tourist in your hometown. I was asleep for most of my life hating the city I live in, but then I opened my eyes. I never saw what was in front of me this entire time. Sure, I’m outgrowing the place, and I’m just aching to wind up wherever my feet take me… but I’m growing to appreciate all that I’m surrounded with.

    This is a beautiful post. I hope you remind yourself often that life is precious and full of excitement! It’s out there waiting for you.

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