I have begun writing this post twice already, telling myself that it’s not perfect and not ready to share. But that is the opposite of what the point of this post is.
Lately, I have been thinking about all the times that I have taken for granted the things that I shouldn’t. I get angry at the minimal side effects of my medicine when I really should just be grateful that I have access to it in the first place. I took for granted the whole first month of my summer, wishing that I could have studied abroad like I had planned.
When I served an elderly woman at work who was wearing my Grandmother’s old perfume I realized I had taken her scent for granted
Often times too, I find that I have a hard time being happy when I know others are sad. But then I think that maybe they wouldn’t want me to be sad for them, because they will be okay in the end.
But sometimes it’s hard to think that everything will be okay in the end. Like when you hear things like “cancer” or “car accident” or “passed away” and you think of them crying and that makes you cry too.
And then you think of the night you served an elderly lady and her family who was out to eat to celebrate her being “cancer free” so you make her a hot fudge sundae and she smiles. Or you think about weddings and vacations and laughter and you stop crying and you’re happy.
And when I thought about this tonight, I decided that that is exactly what life is: it’s taking the really happy times, but also the really sad times too. There has been a lot of really happy times in my life full of playing house and riding my bike and there have been the sad times of being stood up by a silly boy or getting in a fender bender. And there’s the heartwrenching sadness of losing my grandmother.
But with the sadness has come a lot of happiness. Falling in love for the first time, or traveling abroad or making new friends. Or for me, eating really great Mexican food makes me extremely happy too.
So whenever I feel as though I am taking my life for granted I want to remember to enjoy my life. For instance, if I want to eat pasta after my late night shift at work, I am going to do so without feeling guilty about it. I choose you to do the same. And when you’re feeling sad – know that it won’t last forever. Always remember to keep going, always look forward.